Last year, I came across this article, and it was about something I really wanted to address.
http://www.salon.com/2012/10/09/must_i_drink_to_socialize/
Basically, it was a letter to an advice column that stated "It bothers me that without a drink I'm sort of shy and awkward"
I'm sure that's what many have been thinking, and why many chose to drink alcoholic beverages.
Here is my response to that
I say EMBRACE THE SHY SIDE OF YOU!
Yeah, I know, hard to do that, if your family and peers have been stigmatizing your "shyness" for decades.
But the reason humans develop shyness is TO KEEP US OUT OF TROUBLE!
That's right, being reluctant to do something can save your life!
Just look at all the people damaged by "doing it to fit in". Many end up being substance addicts, dead early or in jail.
So EMBRACE YOUR SHY SIDE and (beep) anyone who doesn't like it!
Sometimes, it's better to be introverted than extroverted.
I learned that the hard way and I wrote a blog post on it last year
http://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2012/09/myself-2-decades-ago.html
For one thing, I started middle school with same crazy sense of humor, saying inappropriate things as I did back in elementary school. WRONG MOVE!
Little did I understand the same humor that worked in elementary school did NOT work in middle school. All it did was earn a few enemies.
I might've gotten away with my earlier silliness if I was one of the tough guys.
I wasn't!
After a while, I just learned to shut up in class, especially if you don't have any friends in that class.
Ironically, that got people who just me asking "why are you so quiet?"
But as the quote goes -- "It's better to be quiet and be thought as a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."
I also want to say this:
Being "shy" in certain situations is a basic survival skill!
Sometimes, it's better to keep your mouth shut, and better to just listen, learn and soak in all things you are observing!
I also want to say this to all the parents who are over-worrying about this nonsense of "omg, my child is so quiet, I want him to make friends"
It is way more important to know which peers to avoid than to try be friends with everyone!
When you enter a new school, it is more important to observe than to try to fit in!
One of the ways I avoided trouble in high school that I observed my peers before even attempting to hang out with them.
Whereas I know this one guy who wanted to fit in with a clique thought they would just embrace him if he entered in uninvited! After all, they embraced the same music and fashion. But they didn't respect him! He didn't see the warning signs before joining them. He no longer hangs out with them.
Those who are introverted are less likely to end up hanging out the wrong crowd.
The extroverted, because they always want to be social, many times end up in situations in which their friends are doing the wrong thing (ie. drugs, vandalism, bullying, etc!)
And then what? You already know!
That's right, if you got an introverted child ---- EMBRACE THAT!
Of course, I'm NOT always introverted.
In class, I was usually the one asking questions and making comments on the class topic. Still am!
And by my senior year in high school, I was the life of the party. I sang during talent shows, yelled during pep rallies, and the school events, I was hyper!
That surprised some peers who thought I was "quiet" and "non-social" in some of my classes in previous years!
But I know when to be "shy" and when to be hyper!
But more importantly, I can enjoy a party/event/game WITHOUT drinking alcoholic beverages!
It's called "party responsibly"
Another important life skill!