dealing with attempted break-in and attempted robbery

 For a long time, I was fortunate.  I was living in my current apartment for 19 years without a break-in attempt. Also, nobody attempted to rob me within that time frame.

But luck doesn't last forever. My good streak ended this month.

In the past, there was a woman who lived a floor above me who came home drunk and tried to use her key to open my apartment. I yelled out "WRONG ROOM" and she was very apologetic.  Also, in the past, the police rammed into a nearby apartment for a resident accused of domestic abuse. He resisted letting them in and he resisted arrest.

Well, on the first of this month, as I was taking a morning shower, I could hear a loud pounding on my door. The first time I was wondering "an explosion outside?", "the police trying to go after that neighbor again?", etc. Then I could hear another loud kick on my door, and another one. I yelled out "WRONG ROOM!". Then I could hear that man ask "is this _______ room?" I answered "no", then he said "sorry boss" and he took the elevator down.  I've never seen that person before.

My door had no visible damage. I did call the police who took my information over the phone.  They did call me back again for more questions.  We still don't know who that guy was or what his real intentions were.

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Then last week, I was walking to the bank and then to the shoe repair shop (there was a rip in one of my shoes, and I also had new shoes in which I wanted velcro extensions and heel guards installed). I carried my shoes in a green shopping bag from Longs.

On my way to the bank, I heard a homeless guy saying "that's my bag". I ignored him and kept walking. Then I noticed him following me and he kept saying "that's my bag". I just kept walking and held on to my pepper spray just in case. 

Then I stopped at the corner waiting for the light to change. The guy said, "that's my bag, let me see what's inside". Why should I let him see what's in MY bag? I know his goal was to take my bag. I then yelled "STEP BACK!" and pointed my pepper spray at him. He refused to step back so I pepper-sprayed him. I didn't see anything come out of my pepper spray so I just continued walking away from that guy and walked across the street. He kept following me. 

I went to the bank and asked them to call the police. He was walking around the parking lot. After the bank employee used her phone while looking out the window, then I saw that guy rubbing his eyes.

The police arrived. They saw him first before they saw me.  As a police officer asked me to come out of the bank, I could hear the guy saying to a cop  "that guy took my bag and he pepper-sprayed me". So I was made to look like the bad guy.  The cop asked me "did you pepper spray him" and I confirmed it. The cop said, "you're not supposed to pepper spray people" as if I  was a kid doing it for fun.

An ambulance came to help the real bad guy, the guy who confronted me over a bag that was mine. They poured water and whatever other chemicals they used against the effects of pepper spray. 

The cop that was talking to that guy came over to look at my green bag and concluded that I didn't take his bag. My guess was that he asked that guy what was in that bag, and his description didn't match what's really in my bag.

The cops said to me that I should call the police instead of spraying him. What? The police get away with much worse (including shooting people with bullets) but they lecture me over pepper spray?

If I didn't spray him, he could've punched me, stabbed me, and taken my bag. Even if I did get away and tried to call the police, he could've run up to me and knocked the phone out of my hands (that's why I waited until I got to the bank before asking them to call the police.) And the phone I had is expensive to repair or replace. 

Also, had that guy walked away after I yelled "STEP BACK", I wouldn't have pepper-sprayed.  I don't live for confrontations, I avoid confrontations, but when it's unavoidable, I have to protect myself. 

So no, I don't regret pepper-spraying that guy. He started it! He wanted to create a dangerous situation with me. He started trouble with the wrong person. 

He starts trouble but likes to play the victim when his victim fights back.

The last cop to talk to me said the case wouldn't be likely to result in a criminal trial against me (cross my fingers) but that guy could file a civil suit against me.  That guy should sue himself for his own stupidity. 

The police then let me walk away to go on with my day. As they should. 

They didn't ask if I wanted to file a case against that guy. They should've! I guess they thought that guy being pepper-sprayed was enough punishment for him.  I hope they told him, the next person he starts trouble with might carry a gun. 

As for me, there comes a point in life where I have to live up to the phrase "rather be judged by 12 than carried by 6."

As for that guy, he needs to grow up and leave people alone. It's what I do. 

Notes on recent deaths

In this blog post, I will write about 3 people that I've met in my life that have died earlier this year.  

Uncle Victor

Victor Cardona was the brother of my late grandma Ramona Wegesend (previously named Ramona Caban). 

I've only met him a few times when I was a kid, then I haven't seen him for years, basically because he lived on another island (Maui). The only time I saw him during my adulthood was my grandma's funeral in 2019. At the funeral, he made an impromptu speech towards the end of the service about his relations with my grandma.

An interesting thing about meeting him at the funeral was that he was friends with the family of one of my former students from my substitute teaching days, so I was able to meet that former student again at the funeral. By then, that student already graduated from high school, and we compared notes about our lives after I was subbing at the school.

My grandma's funeral was the last time I saw Uncle Victor. He passed away earlier this month. 

It's times like these I wish I met with my extended family more.

Jeffrey Apaka

Jeffrey Apaka was known in Hawaii as a Hawaiian musician who entertained audiences at various hotels in Waikiki, as well as the son of another legendary Hawaiian musician Alfred Apaka.

He also had a day job at Waikiki Community Center (WCC) as the director of community relations. That was where I met him.  WCC has a preschool where I spent some time as a substitute teacher (mostly from 2007-2010), and I used to always see him walking around.  He was definitely filled with Aloha Spirit and good cheer.  He made everyone at WCC feel like a part of the family.

Learn more about this legendary man at 

https://www.staradvertiser.com/2022/02/01/features/longtime-entertainer-and-hawaiian-recording-artist-jeff-apaka-dies-at-75/

Mark Anthony Garcia

I actually know multiple people with the name "Mark Garcia", so let me be specific,  this Mark Garcia was a former high school classmate. from my time at McKinley High School (should be renamed Honolulu High School) in the late 90's. 

I remember he was in my Marine Science class.  He was a funny guy and likes to joke around with people. During free time, he saw me reading the Source Magazine and we would talk about hip-hop music. 

My favorite memory was in a pep rally, I would cheer on the seniors and he told me "calm down" and I'm like "aren't you a junior?" Fun times! 

I found him on Facebook and we were on each other's friend's list, but he hasn't posted much in recent years so I was out of the loop on what's going on in his life. I found out about his death from one of our mutual friends (another former classmate), and I later learned from one of his relatives (who happened to be a former co-worker) that he had heart problems. 

Sad to see someone around my age die so young.