Friday, December 11, 2020

non-binary games

 In the past few decades, society at large has been gaining a greater understanding of gender diversity.  While most people fit into the male-female binary, not everyone does. 

Some have the physical built of one gender, but feels like the opposite gender in the inside.  Those people are usually referred to as transgender.

Some were born with the genitalia of both genders. Those people are usually referred to as intersex.

People who are transgender or intersex are usually placed in the larger category of non-binary (because they don't fit into the male-female binary).

Being different doesn't mean you're deficient, just different.

In the larger society, people of various genders can mingle and work together. Well, ideally at least.

But when it comes to sports and restrooms, the genders are still segregated, mostly along the male-female binary.

That becomes difficult for those who are non-binary.

Most of the buildings are built before society was educated on non-binary issues, so it becomes awkward for some to use the only restrooms available which are labeled along the male-female binary.  For those who are non-binary, they face serious harassment (and even physical brutality) when they enter either bathrooms.

Newer buildings are built with one-stall restrooms that could be used with either gender. This not only benefits the non-binary, but also parents with children of the opposite gender, or any caretaker in the same situation. 

I actually know some people who advocate for mixed-gender restrooms, where men, women, and non-binary can be in the same restroom at the same time. That probably won't happen anytime. It's not so much the fear of trans women in women's restrooms, it's more the fear of the average heterosexual male in women's restrooms.

Girls hold in pee, skip school so they won't have to share gender-neutral bathrooms with boys (upworthy.com)

 It appears, however, that the introduction of gender-neutral bathrooms in schools in the United Kingdom has made it difficult for girls to go to the toilet. Reports claiming that girls are shamed into holding their pee or skipping school due to the fear of being teased—not by those in the LGBTQIAP+ community, but by boys—have been released. This may just show that these toilets are not the most inclusive solution after all, The Daily Mail reports.

and

Additionally, girls have claimed that they hold in their pee, refusing to urinate all day, due to the anxiety they feel when utilizing same-sex toilets. In some extreme cases, girls have simply stopped drinking liquids at school altogether.

Unfortunately, many girls risk infections when doing so. As general practitioner Dr. Tessa Katz noted, holding in one's pee for extended periods of time on a consistent basis could lead to an increased risk of urinary and bladder infections. She added, "The psychological effects of girls not feeling safe enough to use mixed-sex toilets [are] also concerning." Therefore, doctors and lawmakers alike have called for schools to reconsider their decisions to establish gender-neutral bathrooms. Tory Member of Parliament David Davies affirmed, "If girls are not comfortable sharing toilets with boys then schools should make provision for them, rather than saying girls have got a problem." 

 

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For sports, this is another complicated issue! 

At most schools, there is no "boy's robotics team" or "girl's robotics teams". There's no "boy's science club" or "girl's science club".  There's no "boy's chess club" or "girl's chess club". There's no "boy's yearbook staff" or "girl's yearbook staff". There's just a "robotics team", "science club", "chess club" or "yearbook staff". Anyone of any gender identity can join. 

Some of those student organizations might have an uneven distribution of genders, but even a student organization with 75% males allow for female and non-binary students who are interested. 

Just like even if a basketball team has a tryout of mostly African-American students, even those of different ancestries can try out for the team.  If you got game like Steve Nash or Jeremy Lin, you're on the team! It would be offensive in this day & age for a school to have a "blacks only basketball team" and a "whites only basketball team". And those who don't fit the black-white binary, where would they go?

When it comes to gender, most sports teams are divided based on a binary.  

Being that most people fit within the male-female binary,  it works fine for most people.

But those who are non-binary who are interested in sports, where would they go?

Those who are trans-women might feel that the girl's team would be the best option. However, many females might feel that would put them at a disadvantage since trans-women still tend to have the physical size & muscle mass of the average male.

Women fighters who have fought transgender fighter Fallon Fox have said that her male body mass gave her an unfair advantage even to the point where they said they've never been hit harder in the ring when fighting other female fighters.

But even in non-contact sports (for example, cross country), there is controversy when non-binary athletes win championships in the women's category.


I'm tempted to say let's have a non-binary category for sports, so that there's male sports events, female sports events, and non-binary sports events.  That might be simple for individual sports like track, swimming, or mixed-martial arts, but it gets more complicated for team sports. At most schools, there's most likely not enough non-binary students to fill a basketball team, and even more unlikely to have enough for a tackle football team. Probably the best case scenario would be to combine non-binary students from nearby schools to make a basketball team. 

Just like how an Asian student shouldn't feel left out of a basketball team if his school has mostly students who fit in the black-white binary (that's why it's illegal for teams to discriminate based on race), we wouldn't want a non-binary student to not have an opportunity to pursue an interest in playing basketball.  

There are no simple answers! Non-binary games might still get called "discriminatory" even though I think it's the best answer. And I never want non-binary athletes to feel excluded from the opportunity to play sports and I think if we're going to continue with gender-segregated teams, then non-binary games might be the best answer.

Either that or have all sports have mixed-gender teams!



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Here are some interesting articles with various perspectives on this issue

(note: inclusion of these articles is NOT an endorsement of everything stated in these articles)


articles advocating for the inclusion of transgender athletes

Sport is a Human Right—So Let Trans Women Compete | by Cait Glasson | Arc Digital


We celebrated Michael Phelps’s genetic differences. Why punish Caster Semenya for hers? - The Washington Post

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from a more conservative perspective, addressing concerns about the ability of females to compete with transgender athletes

Unfair Trans Competition in Girls’ Sports (townhall.com)

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on Fallon Fox fighting female fighters

Transgender MMA Fighter Breaks Skull of Her Female Opponent. Are we Becoming too Careful not to Offend any Group of People? - BJJ World (bjj-world.com)


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on an openly lesbian tennis legend Martina Navratilova getting backlash over addressing concerns of transgender athletes compete in women's events.

Martina Navratilova Is Expelled From an LGBTQ Advocacy Group Over Transphobia Accusations | The Nation


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an article advocating for ending gender segregation in sports. The article cites an example of a short female Kanty Canatazaro (only 5 feet tall) beating large males in a televised obstacle course competition that requires strength and stamina.

Stop Segregating Sports by Gender – Reason.com


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my blog post from 2013 on reforming Title IX

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2013/09/improving-on-title-ix.html 


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my 2015 blog post on gender & racial identity, which also address non-binary issues in Western and non-Western cultures

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2015/06/identity.html



Monday, December 07, 2020

bullies get dunked on

 I apologize for not blogging the last few weeks. I've been busy with work and other priorities.


A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog post demanding 98.5 fire their Wake Up Crew. 

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2020/11/fire-985-wake-up-crew.html

 A few days later,  2 out of the 3 members got fired!


And of course, last month, Donald Trump was put on notice that he too is getting fired from his job.


What the 98.5 Wake Up Crew and Donald Trump have in common is that for too long, they never face any real consequences for their bullying behavior. Yes, they received criticisms over the years, but that's nothing when you continue to have job security despite your repulsive behavior! 


And in Trump's case, he had never been told "No" by anyone with real power over him since his father (also known to be psychologically abusive) passed away.  

With decades of being rich and always having armed security with him, Trump has been safe from poverty and physical threats.  Why treat people with respect when you never face serious repercussions for your bullying behavior? 

So definitely Trump is having a meltdown when the majority of American people told him "no more!" He yells out conspiracy theories about fraud!  No, he got rejected by the public! 


As for the Wake Up Crew, they don't have the resources Trump has, so the 2 out of the 3 will have a harder time post-firing. They have made the type of apologies they never made before getting fired.  They now have time for self-reflection. 

Sure, the Wake Up Crew can just start their own podcast but it won't bring the same revenue they had on radio.  They still have a small market for their style of humor, but it's the style of humor that is getting less and less popular. 

And with having to rely on non-media jobs to pay their bills, they'll learn real quick that their style of humor wouldn't fly in most places. Sure they might make a few co-workers laugh, but it only takes one to file a grievance! 

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Look, I used to engage in inappropriate humor growing up. But as I grew older, I learned that it becomes less popular with the people around you. Workplaces don't allow for it!

And when you're pressured to change your behavior, it also pressures you to have a whole new understanding of things!

This pressure is magnified in the education industry (for which I worked from May 2005 to May 2020. This is the first semester in 15 years that I'm not working in the industry). I entered the industry thinking of being "the cool sub teacher". That doesn't work well when you're trying to control a class of students who hardly even know you. So I switched to being a more serious & mature sub teacher. When that happened, not only do my behavior changed, my mindest changes as well.  That's what growing up is. 

And now that I'm 40, I have zero interest in hanging out with people who still engage in the same inappropriate humor I used to be a part of as a kid.  Time to grow up and move on! 



restrain this Miss Lum (the repulsive, racist librarian)

Earlier this year, I voluntarily left my position as a Library Assistant at Kalākaua Middle School!

The head librarian there was Natalie Lum (aka Miss Lum), a  person with really horrible people skills and a negative attitude! 

I wrote a blog post and 2 videos about her repulsive ways. They focus on her unclear instructions, her rudeness, and her negative attitude towards Micronesians. 

I was in the middle of writing my 2nd blog post when the police came by the serve a restraining order from Miss Lum.

The TRO petition was full of exaggerations about my imperfections. She acted as if she was a "damsel in distress", nevermind that her actual reputation on campus was one of "The Enforcer" who relishes the confrontation with students no matter how large they are, or even how large their clique is.  She yells in a low voice "where's your IDs?" when 2 classes (circa 25 students each) enter the library. When teachers lose control of their students in the library, Miss Lum jumps into the fray and installs fear into them.  And even off-campus, she has done side gigs as security at public events.

Does that sound like a "damsel in distress" to you? 

I didn't make any threats towards her. Her physical safety was NEVER in danger! She was just sour grapes that someone had the nerve to publicly disagree with Her Majesty!

That was proven come court time when her lawyer said to my lawyer that she'll withdraw her TRO if I took down my social media posts.

If my physical safety was in actual danger, I would actually beg the judge for the maximum restrictions possible on the opposing person!

But Miss Lum was in no actual danger, therefore, she didn't beg for the maximum restriction possible, she just begged me to take down social media posts.

I asked my attorney if Miss Lum was willing to admit her negative comments about Micronesians. My attorney said her attorney said her comments were "taken out of context".  In other words, she actually made those comments and she's sour grapes about being exposed. 

I took down the posts for a while. 

But you know what.  I'm reposting the info  at

https://pwegesen.wixsite.com/kalakaua-ms-library


(and some documents listed on the website)

Document: Note to administration on Natalie Lum's negative comments about Micronesians (09/04/2019)

Document: "I'm done with Miss Lum: the repulsive head librarian at Kalākaua Middle School (05/20/2020)


 

Document: unpublished post on Miss Lum (06/03/2020) - I was literally typing  this when HPD came by and notified me about Natalie Lum's TRO petition




Document: Pablo's response to Natalie Lum's TRO petition
https://ea0ca297-891e-49d1-bbc9-39760ddd3f6b.filesusr.com/ugd/c8d67a_d082eb26129d41599e231ba39995895c.pdf


and you know what else?


There is NOTHING in what I posted that expresses any violent feelings towards Miss Lum!

Yes, I know these days some people consider disagreement "violence".

But it's not violence.

It's just disagreement.

Miss Lum also considers my response to her "harassment", "stalking" and "cyberbullying".

No, the only thing I did to make Miss Lum uncomfortable is to express disagreement with her. 

Miss Lum can continue to be sour grapes about this! 

But there's anything that needs to be restrained, it should be Miss Lum who should practice self-restraint from retaliating against me for exposing the truth about her.

Miss Lum apologizes for nothing. It's time for her to prove me wrong! It's time for Miss Lum to apologize. 

If there's no additional response from Miss Lum, then this would be my last statement.  

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PS: If Miss Lum wants an external entity to solve this dispute, she should contact a private mediation service (which I'm willing to meet with) to handle this situation instead of wasting the court's time & resources.  The courts should be for real victims of abuse, not so-called "victims" of disagreement. 


PS #2: bonus pics








Miss Lum usually gives unclear instructions and gets mad when things go wrong, then claims her instructions were clear. This is gaslighting in the workplace.




Miss Lum is VERY confrontational, but pretends to be a "damsel in distress" in order to punish those who refuse to be silent about her wicked ways.





Miss Lum uses restraining orders to deter public disagreement with her