College Loans & Student Debt

 We are still waiting on US President Joe Biden to announce his plan regarding student debt.

There is a movement to cancel all student debt.

But Joe Biden was never about radical change, his whole career is about incremental change.

What most likely will happen is that Joe Biden will cancel a certain percentage of student debt based on income.

He knows that canceling the entire debt for someone who makes more than a $100,000 a year will be political poison. He knows this will cause the Republicans to run ads saying "Democrats are giving goodies to the elite at the expense of the working class".

But I do predict (and hope) that he will cancel a high percentage of debt for those who are lower-income and/or unemployed/underemployed.  This will be consistent with the long-time Democrat message that they will help the working class. 

Some Republicans (and their sympathizers) think that canceling debt is about giving bailouts to "snowflakes who majored in oppression studies or comparative literature".

But many of us who are living with debt have done so because we borrowed money to major in something that could lead us to a desired occupation. But the pandemic has dried up opportunities. Even while things are opening up, some employers are hesitant to hire because lord knows what new expenses are coming up in the era of inflation. 

Back in 2013-2015, I went back to school to major in Library & Information Science (LIS), which is an occupation-related major.  Some of my tuition was covered by grants and scholarships (major shout-out to the Friends of the Library of Hawaii). But most of the money I borrowed was for living expenses. I was working as a substitute teacher, a job with major flexibility. I could take time off whenever I felt like it, especially when I had projects due, field trips to attend, internships to complete, or student activities to participate in. 

And that's the thing, for many students, much of the money they borrowed was for living expenses. It's hard to balance a full-time job with a college schedule. Borrowing for living expenses helped us balance our college schedule while also allowing us to take part-time jobs.

And while much of the focus on college activists is on the outlandish fools who scream about "cultural appropriation" and interrupt guest speakers, most of my activism during my LIS years was focused on getting the university's library to be open for longer hours during the summer.  I did convince the university's Graduate Student Organization (GSO) to pass a resolution for increased library hours during the summer.  However, even to this day, the university still hasn't budged. 

(learn more at  https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2015/07/gso-resolution-to-extend-summer-library.html) 

And after college, it took me a while to get a job in which I could use my LIS degree. I finally hit pay-dirt in 2019 with a library position at a middle school. The problem was the head librarian was a turd, and dealing with her nonsense was a detriment to my mental health. I left just when the pandemic was a few months old. Afterward, I did take some temp jobs and a position at a fashion retail store that I worked at before. Meanwhile, libraries have been reluctant to hire new staff throughout the pandemic, but are slowly opening up positions (at least according to current job listings). 

Others had less luck than me.  People got laid off, struggled to get unemployment insurance benefits, and had families to feed. Some could no longer take the pressure and ended their lives. 

People like us deserve a break. We deserve to have our slates wiped clean.  We worked our rears off, made sacrifices, and took risks in an ever-changing world.

Some right-wing nutcases will tell us "you made your choices, deal with it". Yet, at the same time, they demand that we give 2nd chances to racist sex-offenders like Donald Trump! The same guy who filed bankruptcy for this businesses because he didn't want to take responsibility to pay off the debts he originally agreed to. He also gave pardons to those who made stupid choices.

Some will say "I paid my student debt, therefore nobody should get relief!"   That is like saying 

• I suffered, and so shall you

or even worse

• I suffered, and you shouldn't get any relief even though you suffered more than me due to the different circumstances you're dealing with

If I was able to pay off my entire debts before the student debt relief program finally begin, I'm NOT going to be like "how dare others get the relief I didn't get". INSTEAD, I'll be like "I'm glad that the new generation wouldn't face the same stress I had to face" 

Others say "I didn't go to college, why should we pay to bail you out?"

Look, my taxes pay for a whole bunch of things I don't even use. I paid taxes for roads to accommodate those who drive cars that I don't drive.  I paid taxes for mortgage relief for others even though I rent an apartment. I paid taxes to subsidize women's health services, even though I as a male won't use those services. I paid taxes to subsidize the maintenance of hiking trails that I probably will never walk over.  I paid taxes to subsidize projects in states that I probably never get the chance to visit. 

I also pay taxes that subsidize things I don't agree with. I paid taxes to subsidize federal agents who harass and detain immigrants who just want to come here and work. I paid taxes to subsidize federal agents who harass and detain those using cannabis.  I paid taxes for overseas wars that enrich the pockets of defense contractors while putting veterans and civilians at risk. I paid taxes to subsidize fuel tanks that are stationed above an aquifer, which puts our water supply at risk. 

If I'm going to pay taxes for all that, I might as well get something that benefits me. 

-----

And yes, I know, government programs aren't always perfect. I've heard it all, I used to identify myself as a libertarian (or at least a semi-libertarian). But while government-funded safety nets have their flaws, the libertarian jihad/crusade against safety nets turns off people who support other libertarian ideas (some of which I still support like legalizing substances, legalizing gambling, legalizing self-defense,  legalizing immigration, eliminating the Jones Act, eliminating red tape policies that impede work/housing opportunities,  eliminating taxes on food/meds/shelter, withdrawing from foreign wars, etc.). Fighting against safety nets isn't a hill that libertarians shall fight to die on.

Whatever Joe Biden decides to announce on the student debt issue isn't going to satisfy everyone. But hopefully, there'll be a relief for at least those with lower incomes. 

3 decades since the LA Riots

 Today is the 3-decade anniversary of the infamous LA Riots of 1992.

The riots were in response to the Not Guilty verdicts given to 4 European-American officers who brutally beat Rodney King, an African-American man who was suspected of drunk driving.

I wrote a blog post "2 decades since the LA riots" back in 2012.

http://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2012/04/2-decades-since-la-riots.html

I really don't want to spend too much time repeating what I blogged back in 2012 since much of the facts about the incident haven't changed since then.

But I do want to note that some of my predictions from 2012 were very naive in retrospect.

At the time (2012), there haven't been riots in recent years. Barack Obama was president.  Even though I knew that his presidency didn't mean "racism is over forever", I still thought we made enough progress that the days of mass riots are over

The following years proved me wrong big time, especially with the riots that occurred in Ferguson (2013) and Baltimore (2015)

I blogged about those 2 incidents 

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2014/08/ferguson-police-and-race.html

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2015/05/thoughts-on-baltimore-crisis.html

And of course, in 2020, was the racial uprising that made the 1992 LA riots small in comparison. That would be the nationwide reaction to the police-induced death of George Floyd in Minneapolis.

I blogged about it at https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2020/06/the-reactions-to-george-floyds-death.html

Back in 2012, I was naive about human nature (though I wouldn't admit it back then). I thought we were making enough progress to not have a repeat of LA 1992.

But then again, I thought we made so much progress that the USA wouldn't elect an openly racist demagogue like Donald Trump. 2016 proved me wrong.

It's like the saying "2 steps forward, 10 steps back".

And regardless of whoever is president (even if Kamala Harris becomes president in 2024), the police will still over-react to things. And the police unions will still be in fierce defense of police officers who did the wrong things.  And police departments still won't be able to screen out everyone who could cause severe problems on the job. And police officers will still be too scared to report on fellow officers who do the wrong thing. (After all, the blue wall of silence is one of the most effective No Snitching programs ever).

And regardless of whoever is president, there'll still be people who lash out against injustice in destructive ways. This is magnified when there are a lot of people who don't have to report to work the next day.  (LA in 1992 was feeling the worst effects of a recession; the George Floyd incident in 2020 occurred when the nation was slowly coming out of the initial coronavirus lockdown).  This is not to excuse looters or to disparage the safety net, it's just that if you have to report to work the next day, you're less likely to join the destructive mobs burning and looting stuff the night before.  

Inequality isn't going to end soon.  Having more people of African ancestries in political power in the USA isn't going to magically wipe out all the inequalities created by 400 years of oppression.  Moving people up the economic ladder doesn't happen overnight, this takes decades. And even if more African-Americans move up the economic ladder, that wouldn't be enough to erase the racism that exists among the European-American community. In fact, I think success breeds resentment from others. Some European-Americans feel left behind and some do resent those of other races who succeed above them. Some even join the police to take out their frustrations.

And the cycle continues

I don't have all the answers. This blog post is not about the answers.

========

A few articles that I found on LA Riots 3 decades later

Jeong Park. “L.A. Riots Are Remembered 30 Years Later with Hope and Pessimism.” Los Angeles Times. Los Angeles Times, April 29, 2022.  https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2022-04-29/la-riot-30th-anniversary-day-of-coverage. 

 Randy Vasquez. “30 Years Ago, the LA Riots Changed the Lives of These 6 People.” Bluzz.  April 29, 2022. https://bluzz.org/30-years-ago-the-la-riots-changed-the-lives-of-these-6-people-3019890.html

Hal Eisner “LA Riots: Remembering 'Saigu' 30 Years Later.” FOX 11 Los Angeles.  April 29, 2022. https://www.foxla.com/news/la-riots-remembering-saigu.

“Van Jones: The LA Riots Changed America. They Also Changed Me.” CNN. April 28, 2022.  https://www.cnn.com/2022/04/28/opinions/race-la-riots-30-years-unrest-jones/index.html.

Lived Experiences

 Yes, I definitely encourage people to write and talk about their lived experiences. 

Yes, I definitely encourage people to share experiences that may differ from the majority of the society they live in.

After all, I've been sharing my lived experiences on my blog for 19 years (next year is my Big Two-O), and have been posting YouTube videos about lived experiences for 9 years (next year is also my Big One-0). I definitely encourage others to do the same.

However, the words "lived experience" have also been used by supposedly "woke" fanatics who use that term to deter disagreement from those who look different from them. 

They scream if anyone who is not (fill in blank with a racial or gender identity) even dares mention anything related to  (fill in blank with a racial or gender identity).

As if I should only be writing about things that pertain to those who are of Mexican/Puerto-Rican/German/Portuguese/Spanish ancestries who live in Hawaii?

Screw that!

I can write about whatever I feel like! 

In fact, I'll go as far as saying .... Well-rounded individuals engage in conversations about many things, even about things that have NOTHING to do with their lived experiences.

There's MUCH MORE TO LIFE than only talking about things related to your lived experience.

--------

Not only should this blog post be essential reading, so is this article from the New York Times written by Pamela Paul, titled "The Limits of ‘Lived Experience’"

https://www.nytimes.com/2022/04/24/opinion/lived-experience-empathy-culture.html

here are some classic excerpts

Let’s make it personal: Am I, as a new columnist for The Times, allowed to weigh in on anything other than a narrow sliver of Gen X white woman concerns?

and this

People can successfully project themselves into the lives of others. That is what art is meant to do — cross boundaries, engender empathy with other people, bridge the differences between author and reader, one human and another.

Taken to its logical conclusion, the belief that “lived experience” trumps all other considerations would lead to a world in which we would create stories only about people like ourselves, in stories to be illustrated by people who looked like ourselves, to be reviewed and read only by people who resembled ourselves. If we all wrote only from our personal experience, our films, performances and literature would be reduced to memoir and transcription.

What an impoverished culture that would be.

-------

Yes to all that! 

Yes to writing about Japanese things even if you're not Japanese.

Yes to writing about Irish things even if you're not Irish.

And yes to writing about the tiny Latin American community in Hawaii even if you don't share my ancestral backgrounds. 

Now, someone might say "those who don't have your experience could write something inaccurate about you and those like you".

If someone writes inaccurate things about me, I'll just respond by telling what is inaccurate and what is accurate. 

But I'm not going to be like "you're different from me, so don't write about things coming from people like me".

I'm huge on integration. The world needs more integration. 

We will NEVER have peace in this world if everyone is told "stick with your own kind". 

Do you want to know what "my own kind" is? It is ANYBODY of ANY BACKGROUND who shares my interests, and who wants to maximize liberty and justice in this world.

After all, we're only a few days from the 30th anniversary of when Rodney King pleaded to the word "can we all just get along?"

While Rodney King is no longer with us on Earth, the spirit of his worlds shall never perish from the Earth. 

It's time we start embracing his spirit!

 We need to stop segregating ourselves and start integrating with each other! 

In memory of professor Dr. Luz Quiroga

 Dr. Luz Quiroga was one of my favorite professors that I had while attending the University of Hawaii at Mānoa.

http://www2.hawaii.edu/~lquiroga/

Dr. Luz Quiroga

She was part of the Library & Information Science (LIS) program, and she taught the classes that focused on the information science (IS) side of LIS.

Her classes focused on databases, information searching, information retrieval, algorithms, search engines, and that sort of stuff.

To learn more about her areas of expertise, check out http://www2.hawaii.edu/~lquiroga/courses.htm

http://www2.hawaii.edu/~lquiroga/research/research.htm

Because of her expertise in information science, her classes had students from LIS, ICS (Information & Computer Science), CIS (Communication and Information Science), and other majors all in one class. Students came in with differing perspectives on the various topics taught in the class.

Some students in the LIS program felt intimidated to take her class because of the complexities of the topic, plus her accent (she's from Colombia) was difficult for some students to understand. But once you got to know her, you would definitely understand that she was a great mentor who believed in open communications between students and faculty. If you had difficulty, you can always arrange a time to meet with her and she'll help you find ways to approach the coursework.

I took her LIS 678 (Personalized Information Delivery: Information Filtering) in Spring 2015.

While figuring out courses to take that semester, I knew I still needed a class to fulfill the technology course requirement. I went over the options with my academic advisor, and he noted that Dr. Quiroga was in the building, so he invited her to meet with me to discuss what the class was about. After meeting with her, I was sold. I was going to take her class.

That class focused on information searching and information retrieval.

The following was what I wrote after taking the class in Spring 2015

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2015/05/spring-2015-semester.html (scroll down to part 2 in that post)

I took that class just to fulfill a technology course requirement! Also, because some of the students who had the same professor for a different course the previous semester said positive things about her style of teaching. Whereas the other courses in the LIS focus mostly on the L (Library) side of LIS, this class focused on the IS (Information Science) side of LIS! This class also had students from CIS (Communication and Information Science) program, who come to the Information Science field from a different perspective! Basically, this class is about search engines! While that class is called "Personalized Information Delivery", I think it should be called "Information Retrieval and Information Filtering" The Information Retrieval part is about how people search for information, and how search engines retrieve information. Now, when I mean "search engines", I'm not just talking about the famous ones like Google, Yahoo! or Bing! I'm also talking about databases and even the search tab you find in online shopping websites! We learn about the various algorithms search engines use to rank the relevant documents (files, videos, websites, whatevers) when we type in a query. I gave an interesting presentation about queries and how they get tracked, which you can view the power-point version at http://media.wix.com/ugd/c8d67a_573ba83a667043599e0443cb13c5d4f2.pdf The Information Filtering part is about how search engines (ie Google, Yahoo, Bing) and social media outlets (ie facebook, LinkedIn, etc) and other online platforms (ie YouTube) tailor what they show to you to match what interests they have tracked from you in the recent past! So, if you are on YouTube watching a lot of videos from Taylor Swift, when you enter YouTube's homepage, you'll see Taylor Swift's videos recommended to you! Or if your interest in other countries are travel oriented, when you type in a country's name (for example - Egypt), you'll see travel-oriented sites on Google! However, if your interest in other countries are focused on human rights, you might see more results about police brutality and prison torture when you type in "Egypt" instead of seeing travel-oriented sites. We also had projects that we can chose of any topic as long as we can relate it to Information Retrieval or Information Filtering. So one project I did was on "Information Literacy for Youth". My partner for this project has work in both the university and at high schools. She actually taught sessions on how to find information on library catalogs and academic databases! So we talked about how to get students to not just rely on Google or Wikipedia but to also navigate academic databases and library resources. The other project I did was on "Information-Communitiy Technologies for Underserved Populations." One partner was interested in mobile devices for women in rural communities. Another partner was interested in helping older adults with fitness-oriented technologies. And I had some experience researching library services for people with visual disabilities. For my part, I focused on BARD (Braille and Audio Reading Download), which provides access to online audiobooks for eligible users. For my individual work from this class, check out http://pwegesen.wix.com/pablowegesendlis#!lis-678-projects/c22pj

I did forget to mention in that blog post that research on information searching and retrieval goes back decades, before social media, before Google, and even before most homes in the US had internet access.  We read articles from the 1980s about computer scientists trying to come up with a system similar to the social media that we use today. 

In that class, we did learn about the social implications of the algorithms associated with information searching and retrieval.  For example

• what results do people find when doing online searches?
• why do we see certain ads right after we mention a certain topic on social media?
• are students finding relevant information while doing research for their class?

However, I took that class in Spring 2015, which was before the following relevant events happened

• Donald Trump's campaign for president and allegations that he had help from Russian operatives to manipulate social media in his favor
• Donald Trump and other controversial figures being expelled from Twitter and other social media outlets
• An internal report from Meta about how Instagram contributed to body image issues and other mental health issues among its users
• Social media sites being blocked in Russia since the invasion of Ukraine.
• And of course, the pandemic and the spread of misinformation about covid-19, vaccines, and other public health issues

All of that would've been very interesting topics of discussion in that class. 

But enough about Trump and the pandemic, I want to refocus on Dr. Quiroga. 

In her class, before students did their presentations, she made sure that we all meet in her office to go over the plans for the presentation. This way, she can provide some guidance on how to approach the presentation as well as how to correct the weak points before we get up there. I wish more professors could be like that.  Education should be about guidance, not just throwing people to the wolves. 

Because I spent a lot of time in the LIS computer lab, she did ask if I had a computer at home (no) and if I wanted a pre-used computer at home. I passed because I didn't have an internet connection at home at the time, plus I liked doing my work at the computer lab where there are fewer distractions than at home. In my final semester (after I took her class) I finally got a desktop computer at home that I bought on my own with scholarship money. 

Talking about that scholarship, I did get a letter of recommendation from Dr. Quiroga for it. She also allowed me to use her name as a reference for job searches. 

And being that she was from Colombia and that I am part-Latino (I'm of Mexican, Puerto Rican, Portuguese, and German ancestries), I thought it was cool to have an instructor with Latin American ancestry, a rarity here in Hawaii. We did talk briefly about our backgrounds. Too bad I'm not fluent in Español. 

When I was about to graduate, she did give me a gift, a flipbook titled "Pablo" (that's my name 😉) showing images of another Pablo, that one being Pablo Neruda, a Chilean author. 

A few years after I graduated, Dr. Quiroga retired from the university. I haven't heard much from her since.

Then this week, on April 7, I found out that she passed away. The cause of death wasn't announced.

The LIS department did release a tribute statement, which you can read at http://www.hawaii.edu/lis/2022/04/07/in-memoriam-dr-luz-marina-quiroga/

She will be truly be missed

Thoughts on Affordable Housing in Hawaii

 In Hawaii, one of the most significant issues is the shortage of affordable housing. 

Yes, we're on an island, and yes, land is limited.  But part of the reason we have a shortage is human-made.

We could definitely build more affordable units. But there are obstacles. 

Building anything in Hawaii requires permits and dealing with bureaucracy. 

But more disturbing is the NIMBYs (Not In My BackYard), those who throw hissy fits anytime someone proposes any change, no matter how minor or how positive, in their community.  Pretty much EVERY SINGLE PROPOSAL for new affordable housing brings protests from NIMBYs.  NIMBYs claim those new development brings "traffic" and "changes the character of the community".

In Waipahu, when an affordable housing unit was proposed, people in the mostly single-family-house community threw hissy fits because the presence of the new apartments "changes the character of the community".

Gomes, Andrew. “Plan for Low-Income Housing Towers over Waipahu.” Honolulu Star-Advertiser.  August 16, 2021.                                                                 https://www.staradvertiser.com/2021/08/16/hawaii-news/plan-for-low-income-housing-towers-over-waipahu/.

  

The character of the community? What, is the "character of the community" about excluding people from the prospect of moving into homes they can afford? 

These NIMBYs there need to understand that while they may be nostalgic for the days when there were only houses in their neighborhood, times change, and doing the right thing is building apartments that people can afford to move into, even if it changes the look of the community.  If you think seeing an apartment in your community is an "inconvenience", just image the level of inconvenience that comes with not being able to find an affordable unit to live in. 

And closer to my current home, some of the people in Mānoa Valley are protesting the proposal of an affordable apartment unit for elderly people. 

Ordonio, Cassie. “A Plan For Affordable Housing In Manoa Runs Into Opposition From Residents.” Honolulu Civil Bear.  March 21, 2022.                         https://www.civilbeat.org/2022/03/a-plan-for-affordable-housing-in-manoa-runs-into-opposition-from-residents/.

They say it would cause traffic jams. 

Excuse me? Traffic in Mānoa? The only time I ever see traffic jams there is in the morning when parents are taking their children to the private schools in the community.  But isn't that why some people move there, to be near those schools?

And also this, Mānoa Valley is a short driving distance from Waikiki and downtown Honolulu.  Many of the people live there because it is close to the university and the private schools. Whatever traffic they may deal with is NOTHING compared to the traffic people from West and Central Oahu have to deal with.  

As much as I love Mānoa Valley, some of the people there are spoiled and elitist as hell! 

They should stop acting like snobs, take one for the team, and extend a helping hand even if it causes minor inconveniences. I mean, you want to talk about inconvenience, not being able to find affordable housing in the last years of your life is A LOT MORE inconvenient than a minor traffic jam in an upper-middle-class community that is a short driving distance from UHM, Waikiki, and downtown.

And if they're so damn worried about traffic jams, they can stop contributing to it and take the damn bus. The #5 and #6 go up there. 

========

And on today's newspaper, something I'm happy to read about is an affordable community that is welcoming new residents in Kalaeloa. 

Mizuo, Ashley. “Hawaii’s First Tiny Home Project Addressing Homelessness Welcomes First Residents.” Honolulu Star-Advertiser. Last modified April 7, 2022. https://www.staradvertiser.com/2022/04/07/hawaii-news/states-first-tiny-home-project-addressing-homelessness-welcomes-first-residents/.

from the article

Although tenants began moving into Hawaii’s first “tiny homes” project for people experiencing homelessness in December, they were welcomed in an official celebration Wednesday in Kalaeloa.

There are 36 homes in Kama‘oku Kauhale, each about 100 square feet. Residents share a kitchen area and bathrooms.

The tiny homes in the first-of-its-kind kauhale, or village, in Hawaii cost about $500 a month to rent, although if a person is unable to pay, there are options for using city rent relief programs as well as other subsidies. Residents can live there as long as they want, as it is permanent housing.

What I highlighted in bold print - "Residents can live there as long as they want, as it is permanent housing" is my favorite part of the article. 

The reason I say that is many of the affordable, transitional, and similar housing arrangements have rules that ensure that people eventually leave if they're no longer eligible. But that causes more instability and trauma to the people who have already experienced instability and trauma.

Part of stability is being able to stay in the same home for a long time. 

Whereas always having to move brings a lot of stress and chaos.

I can speak to my experience.

When I was growing up, my family was living in a public housing unit meant for low-income residents. It was great in that my family could live in an affordable place that has utilities like electricity and running water as they worked their way out of poverty. 

The problem was when my family income became too high to remain there. Some people might view that as "congratulations, you get to move on". But the logistics of that is a problem.  Especially the logistics of finding a new place and moving the family out of my school's district lines. I had to resort to using grandma's address (she still lived in the same public housing until she passed away) just so I didn't have to change schools, but even using her address caused more problems than it solved because people might snitch.

This is why I love this idea of affordable units where people can stay as long as they like. Having this consistency reduces stress and increases psychological stability.

And that is also my experience as I have lived in my current apartment for 19 years. That's 19 years of not dealing with the stress of finding a new place that I can afford but is also in a convenient location.

However, my apartment is leased (under my parent's name), and while there is talk of possibly extending the lease beyond this decade, there's no guarantee at this time.

In memory of Rowena Raquel

 Another person that I knew from the school days has passed away.

This time, it's Rowena Raquel who I knew from Lanakila Elementary School. I knew her mostly because I used to hang out with her brother Oscar.  Rowena was one grade level ahead of us.  Even though my interactions with her were limited, she was always nice to me.  I even remembered a few conversations I had with her and Oscar as we were walking home from middle school. 

As an adult, she had a rewarding career as a teacher at Waipahu Elementary School. She loved to mention on Facebook about her former students still came to visit her even as they moved on away from elementary to middle & high school. She was definitely an inspiration to her students. Even her colleagues felt inspired as they wrote on Facebook about how she helped them adjust to working at the school.

Sadly, Rowena spent the last few years dealing with colon cancer. She passed away earlier this month at the age of 42.

As I mentioned about her death on Facebook, some of our former classmates expressed their love & support.  While many talk negatively about Facebook, I'll say that the most positive thing about Facebook is that it brings people together in times like these to reunite (virtually) to pay respects to loved ones that passed.  Many of us who got distanced from each other due to time & life circumstances come together as one to express our condolences and memories. 

Will Smith, Chris Rock, speech and violence

Let's be real: many bullies do their dirt because they view pleas for kindness as a green light, as a weakness to exploit! They only understand power, strength, and intimidation, and sometimes you have to communicate in a language they understand. This is not an endorsement of violence, it's an explanation of reality. An explanation of reality doesn't mean I like that reality.

We can talk about "free speech", "be the bigger person", "violence is not the answer", yada yada yada, all day & all night. But let's be real, a person can only take so much abuse before they lash out! You can only hold so much pent-up rage inside for so long. This is magnified when the disrespect is so public.

I can laugh out loud with the best of them, but we also have to be real about the fact that many comedians thrive on bullying the vulnerable. And to protect themselves from retaliation, comedians say "it's just a joke". That statement is powerful because people fear being accused of "not taking a joke" or "you too sensitive". I think people fear that MUCH MORE than they fear snakes, sharks, or hurricanes. This " you can't take a joke" gives comedians leeway to further bully their targets into not fighting back.

Me (and most of u) remember trying to laugh off an insult to keep yourself from either crying or lashing out with rage! because people truly fear being accused of "not being able to take a joke".

And this is where Will Smith and Chris Rock come in. Both are big-time entertainers since the 1990s. Will Smith specializes in light-hearted jokes. Chris Rock, on the other hand, specializes in mean-spirited jokes. But of course, he wouldn't dare try it at the Source Awards (a now-defunct hip-hop award show) where the big names have entourages of people coming straight off the streets (or sometimes even straight out of parole). So, therefore, Chris Rock prefers to do his mean-spirited attacks at the Oscars or the MTV awards where the big names are less likely to retaliate.

Chris Rock made a joke about Jada-Pinkett Smith's bald head, nevermind that it's due to a medical condition called alopecia. At first, Will Smith tried to laugh it off (like most people targeted by insulting jokes), but you can only take the abuse so long. So Will Smith went on stage to slap Chris Rock.

All the virtue-signalers on social media start claiming that Will Smith committed an act of "toxic masculinity". BULL-NONSENSE. Will Smith took a stand AGAINST toxic masculinity by putting Chris Rock on notice that his comedic bullying is not acceptable. People like Chris Rock thrive on ridiculing the sensitive. Saying "please don't hurt my feelings" doesn't work on Chris Rock.

Plus, Will Smith did have some level of restraint by walking off stage after giving Chris Rock just one slap. Do you think someone like Suge Knight would show that kind of restraint? We all know the answer is no!

One of my friends on social media did have a good point that Will Smith could've taken the mic from Chris Rock and made this statement

 he could have calmly walked up to the mike, explained to everyone that Jada has a medical condition called alopecia, shared her struggles with it, why she has decided to embrace it instead of hiding it, and that he loves and supports her no matter what. Then he could have walked off the stage leaving Chris to look like a completely insensitive jerk. I think that would have been a more powerful approach.

I agree that would've been a more powerful approach.

But I still won't fault Will Smith's action, because in real-time, you won't always be able to think through all the options under duress.

Let's also remember that back in the 1990s, when the hip-hop world was moving away from pop-rap and towards gangsta rap, Will Smith was ridiculed as being a "soft rapper". Being called "soft" (especially in a hyper-masculine environment) can definitely cause some psychological issues that make you want to overcompensate, to show the world you're not soft!

I remember growing up, people asking me "why didn't you fight that guy?" after being insulted. What did I learn from that! I learned that it's cool to lose control of your anger. That kind of messaging is hard to turn off even as you mature into a work world where losing control of your anger can get you fired.

Violence should be a last resort. But sometimes, that's all you got left.

Back in 2019, I dealt with a drunk former classmate Patsaya Mounthongdy who ridiculed me in front of others about my refusal to drink alcoholic beverages. First, I shrugged it off. (that's the fear of being accused of "can't take a joke"). Later on, I talked to Patsaya in private to stop ridiculing me, that I have serious reasons to not drink alcoholic beverages, that I take the issue seriously. (this is the "please don't hurt my feeling" plea) At first, he was apologetic. A few minutes later, as the venue was shutting down, he started to ridicule me again, by yelling out "Pablo, you ruined the vibe of the party." That's when I snapped! I pulled out a pepper spray, pointed it at his face, and yelled to him "SHUT THE F---- UP!"

Only then did he take it seriously.

Me shrugging off an insult DID NOT WORK!

Me pleading with him to not hurt my feelings DID NOT WORK!

People like him only understand ridicule, strength, and intimidation. But pointing a pepper spray and yelling at him to "SHUT THE F---- UP!", I spoke to him in a language that he understands.

My experience with bullies also informed me that merely walking away would've just empowered him to follow me and continue the insults.

Also, anyone with street smarts would know that he would've jumped on me the minute he sees me taking out a phone to call the police.

A threat of getting pepper sprayed is THE ONLY REASON Patsaya backed off!

A person who saw me snapping at Patsaya but didn't witness the earlier insults from Patsaya told me that I should've been more "professional". Excuse me, I've done that MULTIPLE TIMES before I snapped. Patsaya doesn't understand professional communications, he thinks that type of stuff is for wusses.

Learn more about the incident at

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2019/06/my-20th-year-reunion.html

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2019/07/still-resisting-peer-pressure-to-drink.html

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=se1i4xC1C54

Some people reading this will assume I'm endorsing violence. No, I'm explaining reality! 

The same reality that says that "1+1=2 is true" regardless of how you feel about "1+1+2".

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I also want to respond to social media statements that "white people shouldn't be commenting on black people's business".

As far as I'm concerned, anyone can have an informed opinion about a situation involving anyone of any race. It's called "judging people by the content of their character".

Will Smith and Chris Rock have been in the public eye for decades, they have a long track record that people of all ancestries can analyze and make conclusions. 

The incident also happened on a widely viewed telecast, this isn't behind closed doors. It happened in a mostly "white" environment, of course, they're going to have an opinion about it. 

I didn't get mad when non-Latine people expressed opinions about the behaviors of Aaron Hernandez or Tekashi 69. I don't assume that anyone who criticized their behaviors automatically wants me deported to the other side of the border.  

Anyone's behavior is fair game. 

And if Chris Rock can transition away from making mean-spirited jokes, and if all the other "politically incorrect" people can transition away from making mean-spirited statements, then we can really be closer to  Rodney King's dream of a world where we can all get along!