Journalists and "friends" who insist on asking about traumas!

I saw this article about how pop singer Mandy Moore refused to give an interview with a journalist who insists on asking about past traumas that she already discussed multiple times already!

https://www.scarymommy.com/mandy-moore-interview-canceled-trauma/

In an Instagram story, Moore shared an email with an interviewer where they explain that unless Moore is willing to talk about her first husband (who we won’t name here out of respect for her), they would not go forward with the interview.

Moore posted a screenshot of the email (with names redacted, of course) alongside her own public statement explaining why it’s so violating for a reporter to act like they (and the world) are entitled to access to the most traumatic parts of her life on demand. 

 

I agree with Moore's approach (though I personally wouldn't redact names, but that's just how I roll) because I've had "friends" who insisted on asking me questions about past traumas, even though it involved past conflicts with people I haven't even seen in over a decade! I snapped at those so-called "friends", and sent them emails calling them "energy vampires" because constant discussions of those types of things drain my energy!

That same "friend" even had the nerve to ask me if I had mental illnesses and Aspergers.

Excuse me, who appointed you to be my psychiatrist?

If you're not my psychiatrist (or a similar type of professional), then don't ask me these questions.

I also had "friends" who are on the opposite extreme. These "friends" want me to be silent about traumas at all times. They tell me "let it go, don't let it get to you" . Yet, when I point out their hypocrisies, they act all hurt and called my other friends acting all traumatized because I pointed out these hypocrisies.

I HATE talking about traumas. I'm more comfortable writing about past traumas than I am talking about it! 

This is where my blog comes in! I write it out, leave it for the world to read it. But that's all the world is going to get from me! 

As for those so-called "friends" who advise me to not blog about my traumas, they are not my allies, they are my enemies to be destroyed!

Actually, I did blog about that one "friend" who advised me to not blog about my past traumas . At the time, I mentioned his name.  He then called my other friends in emotional distress, which is more proof of his hypocrisy. I took down that blog post in hopes we could reunite in the 20th year reunion. He didn't show up! 

But he did write blog  posts expressing emotional distress about my blog posts expressing disagreement with him (nevermind that he advised me not to blog about my traumas) though he didn't mention my name. I took the high road by not adding fuel to the fire. But if he does respond to this, I can guarantee more fuel! 

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As far as I'm concerned, real friends will back you up when you're dealing with a problem, but they also won't insist that you keep talking about it! Real friends will also give you space with some moments of silence which does wonders in de-escalating situations.

 Real friends will also boost your spirit by talking about common enjoyable interests. By talking about common enjoyable interests and participating in enjoyable activities, you contribute to boosting your friends' spirits and their mental health.  :)

David Ige and Aloha Stadium

Aloha Stadium, built in the 1970s, and heavily rusted from the salty air, is way past its prime.

As mentioned in the previous blog post, the state has basically given up maintaining the stadium and is ready to build a new one. 

http://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2021/01/aloha-stadium-shutdown-and-where-uh.html

Plans have already been drawn up and we are closer to taking action to build a new one! 

But here comes Hawaii governor David Ige to cause even more trouble.

He is now saying we should maintain the outdated & obsolete stadium instead of building a new one! 

from today's Honolulu Star-Advertiser

https://www.staradvertiser.com/2021/02/10/sports/ferds-words/ferd-lewis-gov-david-iges-comments-on-maintaining-the-aging-aloha-stadium-cloud-the-outlook-for-a-new-facility-in-halawa/

This is a new low for a guy who has a long reputation for being tone-deaf! 

His insistence on keeping our outdated and obsolete stadium is going to cost us more in the long run! 

But David Ige reflects the typical mentality in Hawaii that keeps us from progressing! 

We just can't seem to let go of things that aren't working, we just keep clinging to obsolete crap out of nostalgia! Sometimes, we have to put nostalgia on the side, be real with ourselves and take start taking action!

Tear down the old stadium and build a new one!

Stop delaying! We've been delaying for too long!

on de-platforming social media users

 I have some mixed views on de-platforming users on social media.

Anyone with an opinion can easily trigger someone to try to get you off social media. 

I had people attempt to censor me because I dared to expose the truth about some really corrupt and repulsive people. 

That being said, the truth is that nobody is entitled to an account with a social media platform.

Twitter is not obligated to keep you on Twitter. The same is true for Facebook, Instagram and even the Blogger that I'm using now.

Twitter was milking all the Donald Trump tweets for all the attention it was worth until after the attempted coup on January 6. 

Many right-wingers claim that the social media companies were censoring conservatives.

Adam Craig,  a writer for the libertarian-leaning Cato Institute, had a classic response to that

Plenty of questionable choices or misfiring algorithms, but I’ve yet to hear of anybody who got banned by a social media...

Posted by Andy Craig on Saturday, January 9, 2021

Andy Craig

January 9 at 3:07 PM  · 

Plenty of questionable choices or misfiring algorithms, but I’ve yet to hear of anybody who got banned by a social media platform for advocating lower taxes, school choice, and constitutional originalism.

Almost like it’s not really about “censoring conservatives.”

Let's also remember that the Trump-loving right-wingers practiced "cancel culture" with their over the top reactions to Colin Kaepernick, The Chicks (the band formerly known as "the Dixie Chicks"), and basically any person who dares to question Donald Trump's majesty! 

As for me personally, I'd rather not advocate de-platforming anyone. I want the voices of others (especially the voices I hate) to be available so that we can keep track of them. 

In fact, social media posts were used to find those who were involved in the attempted coup at the US Capitol on January 6. 

From Reason Magazine

https://reason.com/2021/01/12/parler-twitter-social-media-speech-ban-terrorists-capitol-riot-trump/

There's another reason to be wary of far-reaching bans and takedowns that have the effect of purging extremists from mainstream social media sites: Many such social media users will migrate to corners of the internet where it's harder to track their activities. Ironically, this could make it more difficult for law enforcement to foil violent plots, and more challenging to prosecute those who are responsible for violence.

Indeed, the swift justice currently being meted out to the rioters who stormed the Capitol last week is an illustration of this point. From the man who stole House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's (D–Calif.) lectern to the masked figure who brought zip ties (and his mom) inside the building, social media has been indispensable at helping to identify riot participants. The fact that so many of them tweeted about their plans—or even uploaded selfies while they were in the act of trespassing—means it will be trivially easy to arrest, try, and convict them.

There are similar lessons in counterterrorism. A recent study by the criminologist Joe Whittaker took a look at the Islamic State's social media presence and found that the group was too online for its own good. Terrorists who discussed their plans on social media were twice as likely to be apprehended by law enforcement.

"It is vital to understand the unintended consequences," wrote Whittaker. "This is particularly the case for content removal, which may inadvertently be aiding terrorists and hampering law enforcement investigations."

So I say let the bad guys talk on social media. Censoring them isn't going to make them go away! 

And more importantly, the solution to bad uses of speech is to make good use of speech.

Deplatforming is a lazy way to act like your opponents don't exist! It "protects" you from actually working on your talking points!

You can't know who your opponents are if you don't know how they think!

So learn from your opponents, build up your intellectual depth and learn to make a stronger case for your ideas! 

It's not easy but it can be done!  

Robinhood & GameStop & the stock market

 I'm not much of an expert on the stock market.

I only have 2 stocks.

The first one was one share of Disney, which my oldest brother gave me as a Christmas gift back in 1998.  I still receive chump change checks from them every year.

Then in 2019, I got a flyer in the mail from Robinhood promising one free share of stock if I applied. I investigated Robinhood online and learned it has a legit reputation. I applied and was given one share of Sirius XM, a satellite radio company. I have never listened to a Sirius XM broadcast so I decided to sell it and buy a share from a company whose product I used. Being that I'm a BlackBerry user, I bought a share of BlackBerry.

When I got my first BlackBerry smartphone (the Q10) in 2013, people said the company was going bankrupt. 8 years later, the company is still living.

In fact, around the time people were manipulating the market by buying shares of GameStop, the price of BlackBerry stock was also increasing! 

Some people preach investing in the stock market as a way to increase wealth. Some friends claimed they make their money in the stock market.

As for me, I prefer spending my money on immediate needs as well as paying off current debt.  Some of the leftover money is used in promoting & making my music. (look up Pablo the Mad Tiger Warrior on wherever music is sold or streamed).

 I'm not ruling out buying more stock in the future.

But I prefer not all my money be invested in the stock market. It is too unpredictable to rely on. 

The legends of baseball

 Last month, 2 legends of baseball passed away: Tommy Lasorda & Hank Aaron!

Tommy Lasorda

Associated Press

Tommy Lasorda

Tommy Lasorda played in the Major Leagues in the 1950s, but his legend had more to do with his bold personality as a coach & a manager in the following decades. 

As a manager of the Los Angeles Dodgers, his team made the playoffs many years and won the World Series in 1988. 

He was very excitable around his players and confrontational with referees and journalists. 

He appeared in TV ads for Ultra Slim Fast, a protein shake that is advertised to help people lose weight. 

He has also done speaking gigs around the country, including my graduation ceremony at the University of Hawaii at Manoa back in 2004!  I remember mostly his loud talks of the importance of getting an education, and also his joke about liking baseball better than football (and I was sitting next to a member of the UH football team. He laughed it off). 

Lasorda coached in the 2000 Olympics. He later spoke out in defense of keeping baseball in the Summer Olympics when it was dropped from the  2012 & 2016 games. Baseball expected to return to the Olympics this year (if they actually not cancel it again this year due to the coronavirus).

Last year, Lasorda was able to witness the Dodgers win its first World Series since the time he coached the team to victory in 1988.

A few months later, on January 7, 2021, Lasorda died from a heart attack. He was 93 years old.

learn more at                                  https://www.staradvertiser.com/2021/01/08/breaking-news/tommy-lasorda-fiery-hall-of-fame-dodgers-manager-dies-at-93/

tribute video from the Dodgers                          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PAqw6dp56CU

Hank Aaron

Public Domain

Hank Aaron

Hank Aaron was one of the greatest (if not, the greatest) baseball players of all time. 

He was best known for breaking the home run record in 1974. The record was previously held by Babe Ruth. This was resented by many white supremacists who sent Aaron threatening letters as he got closer to breaking the record.

Aaron was born in Alabama during the Jim Crow era and started his career in segregated leagues. He entered Major League Baseball in 1954, a few years after Jackie Robinson joined as the first African-American player. 

Aaron spent most of his career with the Braves, a team that moved from Milwaukee to Atlanta during his time there.  He broke the record while the team was in Atlanta, a formerly segregated city that has since become the center of African-American culture. 

Aaron later became an executive within the Atlanta Braves organization as well as with Turner Broadcasting Station (TBS) which broadcast the games.

Aaron later experienced seeing his homerun record being broken by Barry Bonds back in 2007.  Bonds was under controversy at the time for allegations of steroid use.  People suggested putting an asterisk (*) by Bond's name in the home run list. Others responded that the asterisk (*) should be by Babe Ruth's name since he competed in a racially segregated time and therefore couldn't accomplish feats with competition from players of all races. 

Aaron was gracious during all this, congratulating Bonds on his accomplishment.

Aaron passed away on January 22, 2021, at the age of 86.

A few weeks earlier, he took the vaccine for the coronavirus. This situation encouraged the anti-vaxxers to spread doubts about the vaccine's safety. It has not been publicized if it was actually the vaccine that contributed to his death. Thousands of others took the vaccine with no known side effects. 

learn more about Hank Aaron at                       https://www.staradvertiser.com/2021/01/22/sports/sports-breaking/hank-aaron-baseballs-one-time-home-run-king-dies-at-86/

The tribute video from the Atlanta Braves                                               https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IpFuuhnw5Y

coming soon

 I haven't been able to blog as much as I like being that I've been busy with work and organizing my stuff at home. 

Some stuff I hope to be blogging about soon

• baseball greats who passed away recently (ie Tommy Lasorda, Hank Aaron)
• some political stuff
• some life stuff

Anyways, I hope to have time to blog about it soon! 

Trump and the pause on optimism

 Donald Trump's reign of error is finally over!

He was definitely the worst person to become US president in my lifetime.

But if anything good came out of it, it woke me up from the naive optimism about progress, especially when it comes to race relations.

Being that I was born in 1980, the idea of segregated water fountains was always ancient history to me. 

I grew up in integrated neighborhoods and had friends of different ancestries. 

Yes, I did face some stereotyping growing up in Hawaii with Latin-American ancestry, as I noted in this classic article I wrote after Rod Tam said the "wetback" slur at a city council meeting back in 2008. http://archives.starbulletin.com/2008/06/10/editorial/commentary2.html

(note: Rod Tam lost 2 elections since then. He passed away in 2019)

But still, I grew up in a mostly integrated environment with friends of various ancestries. 

So I  assumed that from here on forward, no person in my lifetime could be elected president by yelling out racist stereotypes.

Yes, I grew up knowing that there was still the KKK and the neo-Nazis in existence in the continental US. I grew up watching the 1992 LA Riots go on, and rappers yelling "F--- the Police" due to the abusive, racist behavior of some cops.

But even though 2pac said "America is not ready for a black president" (and it didn't happen in his lifetime), I already assumed it was going to happen in my lifetime before I even heard the name Barack Obama.  Though I thought the first black president would be someone with military experience, someone like Collin Powell. 

In 2000, my optimism was expanded when then-presidential candidate George W Bush expressed support for a more lenient immigration policy while anti-immigration fanatic Pat Buchanan left the  Republican Party. I thought that from that point on, the Republicans have finally ditched the anti-immigration rhetoric that angered Latino voters, especially in California. 

When I was at the University of Hawaii in the early 2000's, I wrote an opinion article for the campus newspaper (Ka Leo O Hawaii) expressing that America despite its flaws, didn't fit the gloom & doom narrative of the Radical Left.  

http://www.manoanow.org/u-s-not-best-but-better/article_6d472f49-b449-5e1a-b358-2c71a45553f2.html

My writings were partly inspired by Larry Elder (aka the Sage of South Central). However, that article of mine was met by fierce resistance by a person from Atlanta (probably the richest black-majority city on Earth) who dared me to visit his hometown's housing projects, nevermind that I too was from a public housing project where I was a minority. 

http://www.manoanow.org/letters-to-the-editor-11-05-01/article_7a0c9675-6b90-5f65-b70d-d694fcc92c02.html

I felt vindicated when Hawaii-born Barack Obama was elected to be the USA's first black president in 2008. 

Yes, I knew that he had to be protected by the Secret Service earlier than most presidential candidates due to threats from white supremacists.  But he won the election, not them.  That means he was more popular than they were. 

Despite everyone's fear (including mine), Obama survived his entire 2 terms without an assassination attempt.

So when Donald Trump opened his campaign with statements about Mexican immigrants being "rapists", "bringing crime & drugs", yes I was offended, not only because I have Mexican ancestry, but also any racial stereotype is offensive. But even then, I thought he wasn't really going to win.  I mean, why would a country that recently elected an African-American president all of a sudden, vote for a racist white president?

I can't be the only one with such naive optimism. Hillary Clinton's campaign just expected everyone to vote for her just because she's not Trump.  Her campaign didn't even put much of an effort in several swing states that have been voting Democrat since her husband's 1st campaign in 1992. 

Trump almost lost momentum in the final month of the campaign when it was revealed that he bragged about grabbing women by their vaginas.   That should've offended any decent person. However, rapists and their sympathizers vote too!

What the 2016 campaign taught me was that you just can't rely on people being offended by racism or misogyny. Much of Trump's support came from either racists, sexists, or people who may not be racist/sexist but didn't have an instant gag reflex towards racist or sexist remarks.    Apparently, even people of non-European ancestries don't always have an instant gag reflex towards racist remarks about themselves.  As rapper 50 Cent said, he didn't care if Trump doesn't like black people, he'll support him as long as he lowers his taxes.

Trump's victory in 2016 basically blasted my optimism about America into pieces. It was the final straw that finally made me declare that Hawaii should be independent from the USA. 

(my blog posts declaring my support for an independent Hawaii)

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2016/11/its-time-for-hawaii-to-declare.html

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2016/11/a-petition-to-make-hawaii-independent.html

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2016/12/my-letter-to-newspaper-hawaii.html

And here's a 2018 blog post titled

"personal evolution on my thoughts on US foreign policy, patriotism, imperialism and Hawaii independence"

https://pablowegesend.blogspot.com/2018/05/personal-evolution-on-my-thoughts-on-us.html

========

Trump wasn't kidding around when he openly appealed to white supremacists in his campaign. He gave them what they wanted when he banned migration from several Muslim majority countries, as well as forced family separation among detained undocumented immigrants from Latin America. 

That should've been enough to offend all decent people.

But the sad thing about all that is that Trump continued to grow his legion of followers into the largest cult of personality in American history. 

In 2020, the Democrats still weren't even that organized, still put up a lackluster campaign, and weren't able to respond effectively to Trump's scare-mongering propaganda about the riots that occurred after the police murder of George Floyd. Trump was also able to scare Cuban & Venezuelan refugees (and their descendants) in Florida about the Democrats being "socialists". 

  But the Democrats got lucky that Trump totally mismanaged the coronavirus crisis and got "The Rona" himself in the final month of the campaign. That was what ended Trump's momentum. And to be fair, Stacey Abrams had an effective strategy to increase African-Americans voter turnout in Georgia, turning a longtime Republican state into the Democrat column. 

Now that Joe Biden is president, I do have some optimism about America going in the right direction. He is already working on a more lenient immigration policy. He is taking the coronavirus crisis seriously.  And more importantly, despite Biden's goofy moments, he is obviously a more mature leader than Trump. 

But with the experience of 2016-2020, my optimism is now less naive.

There is always the possibility of a Trump-like politician winning again, especially if the Democrats take the 2020 victory for granted.

The Trump voters are still around, still waiting for the next politician who makes them feel comfortable about their racism & sexism. And even some people with non-European ancestries are so willing to "own da libs" that they're willing to side with those who are racist towards them. 

I still believe Hawaii can benefit from being independent from the USA.  Why should we be so dependent on the mercy of swing voters who live thousands of miles away?

But even if Hawaii traditionally vote Democrat, there's still a group of Trump supporters here. They as a group have gotten quieter when it was revealed a silent majority voted against their cult leader.  But those people are still a problem as they have shown to not have a gag-reflex towards racism or misogyny. Some are even non-Europeans who happen to be racist towards other non-Europeans (for example, some Polynesians & Asians are racists towards Micronesians).  Hawaii has to deal with its own xenophobic deplorables and we can't just only blame the continental US for their existence here. 

I don't want to dabble too much into pessimism, but we can't let naive optimism make us too lazy in working for a less prejudiced society.